Jul 15, 2015
7 Reasons to use eHarmony!Last time I checked, half of marriages in the US still end in divorce. My own painful experiences strongly support statistical percentages. ...
Jul 15, 2015
7 Reasons to use eHarmony!
Last time I checked, half of marriages in the US still end in divorce. My own painful experiences strongly support statistical percentages. So where does one go to find lasting romance? And after experiencing the misery of divorce and the sheer terror of dating as a middle-aged man, what steps can one take to find true love? My own best efforts rendered me defeated, misunderstood and reeling from the pulverizing reality of destructive relationships. Even when one is open to change and ownership of their part in a failed marriage, the emotional and spiritual rupture can be overwhelming and indelible. Good news! One online dating service provided me with the confidence and courage to successfully reenter marriage and not only find compatibility but also a partner who shares my passions, encourages my honesty and harmonizes my zest for life. You too can finally find love and success in romance. eHarmony has the recipe!
I tried other dating sites, but they fell short of eHarmony’s method of using 29 dimensions of compatibility. By the use of effective questioning, eHarmony identifies core traits and vital attributes of each person to find a more precise compatibility. This process leads to an honest selection process predicated on clear areas of agreement as well as those human characteristics that can stop a relationship dead in its tracks. Yes, “must-haves” and “showstoppers” are also identified.
If you are single, divorced, widowed and discouraged by the dating scene, I understand completely. Take the time to invest in your future relationship by working the EHarmony program.
7 reasons to choose eHarmony.
The 29 dimensions of eHarmony’s profiling are centered on honest answers to the questions posed. Take the time to be honest about yourself. Answer the questions with a sincere heart; be open and vulnerable. This is a MUST.
MAKE THE TIME-
I recall spending several hours completing the first profile. I also remember being time constrained and frustrated by the number of questions asked. Give yourself enough time to accurately answer the questions with authenticity and clarity. Your initial investment of time and energy will be well worth the effort.
ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT-
This includes all aspects of your life. You already know something about mistakes made in past relationships, desires left unspoken, actions, reactions and painful disconnects. When selecting past partners, where did you go? Were there indicators early on that provided a glimpse of what to expect or were you simply blindsided by the hormone Oxytocin? Either way, you now have a chance to be completely honest.
So many of our boogiemen are fears based on vaporous nothing. So, too, are those deeply held secrets, tightly wound inside and covered so that no one can touch, see or experience. Intimacy demands uncovering what you hold within. Answering questions from eHarmony is the start of honest sharing that can and will evolve into intimacy if you select the right partner.
NOT A DRESS REHEARSAL-
As I state frequently in my work at Illuminate AMbitions, “This is not a dress rehearsal. This is the REAL DEAL!” We are not practicing to live our lives. If you want a successful life-filling relationship, act with purpose. Come forward with all you have in a genuine manner, sharing the good, bad and the ugly. And ask for the same from a future partner.
STAY WITH IT-
The eHarmony program takes time. There are levels of engagement requiring step-by-step completion. Go into this endeavor with the realization that it is an investment of time, energy and passion. Do not let up.
You will find the program captivating if you allow yourself the opportunity to enjoy the ride! The trepidation you have experienced in attempting to go it on you own is mitigated by eHarmony guiding you toward success. Be enthusiastic and joyful as you navigate through the process.
Jul 14, 2015
5 Reasons to be REALAt Illuminate AMbitions, our logo includes the statement, “Bring your I AM into the Light,” signifying the heart of our work. Embedded in ...
Jul 14, 2015
5 Reasons to be REAL
At Illuminate AMbitions, our logo includes the statement, “Bring your I AM into the Light,” signifying the heart of our work. Embedded in this aspiration are qualities of integrity, honesty, compassion and a driving force to support clients and organizations in bringing forward their soulful and spirited essence: their truth! Clients, customers and employees share the same unique quality of being ‘human.’ We know the difference between rote systematic adherence to policies and procedures in the business world. We also have a keen knowing when someone is being genuine as opposed to speaking corporate talk, the company line and mouthing words that relegate us to a number rather than an individual. One of the greatest competitive edges in business today is authenticity. Professionals and companies that embolden practices based on authentic truth differentiate themselves from the rest in a bold manner.
In life, as in business, our feelings impact our decisions. Years ago when purchasing an automobile, I decided to avoid the tumultuous dance of a salesperson having to ‘check with their manager’ over and over again to achieve the sale. I did research and was perfectly competent and knowledgeable. Rather than go through the car buying tug-of-war, I gave my price and said, “take it or leave it.” Since that time I have incorporated this method into many areas of my life. Today, the ‘take it or leave it’ strategy has transformed to, ‘Here is my true self. Accept me or not.’
I may not have control over others’ thoughts, actions and methodologies, but I do have control of my own inner psychic world. In my recently published book, Conscious Leadership: 7 Principles That WILL Change Your Business and Change Your Life, the first conscious principle is, BE THE REAL YOU. As stated in the book,
“For many years I played the part of who I thought others wanted me to be: high performer, successful executive, strong male figure, breadwinner, husband and father. Years of subduing my true self brought only unhappiness and a sense of dread. I had a falseness that others would feel as an undercurrent in our interactions. When I was able to start sharing the real Michael as a unique and loving person, people around me began to have a very different experience. “
Better products, improved customer service and operational excellence are important attributes for a successful organization but authenticity separates good from amazing. Dare to be honest. Build strong ethics and integrity for yourself and your organization. Authenticity changes the playfield in a big way!
Here are 5 reasons to be REAL.
AUTHENTICITY ignites human connection-
Human beings are highly complex superconductive electromagnetic miracles. As electrically charged beings, the flow of positive energy elevates to a higher frequency when we are honest and genuine. You are never better, stronger, more creative and compelling than when you are your TRUE SELF.
AUTHENTICITY opens the door to vulnerability-
When we are vulnerable, we are dropping the false trappings of title, status and formality. Human beings want to connect. Being open and honest, even in acknowledging your shortcomings and mistakes, is life affirming and builds union.
AUTHENTICITY creates openings for learning about others-
If you live your life on the fringes, always afraid of opening up to more, letting fear be the guide as opposed to love and compassion, you miss out on the wonderful experience of learning and knowing others from a deeper, more meaningful level. Being authentic creates room for others to do the same.
AUTHENTICITY requires consciousness-
When you decide to show up as the REAL YOU, you have consciously moved into a different realm of reality, one of expansion and much greater connection. Becoming aware of being aware means stepping into the present tense. There, you are better able to make different choices, ones that uplift you and others.
AUTHENTICITY changes your world perspective-
When you no longer need to hide behind what others want you to be, or say, or do, you put aside the lies, the falseness and open up to a world of endless positive opportunities. Try it, you just might like it!
Jul 11, 2015
5 Myths About FEARFear has prevented me from living true to myself and from taking prudent risks. But fear is a broad catchall for other negative emotions. ...
Jul 11, 2015
5 Myths About FEAR
Fear has prevented me from living true to myself and from taking prudent risks. But fear is a broad catchall for other negative emotions. Fear is based on future outcomes that, in most cases, do not occur. We tend to separate emotions of anger, hate, jealousy, betrayal, resentment, sadness, hurt, and discontent from fear. Yet, all are tentacles of the same root cause: fear. This pattern has pulled me away from honest self-expression, meaningful exchanges of love and compassion while also limiting my leadership ability and catalyzing a life governed more by the incessant false ego than the universal gift of love in all its magnificent possibilities. The outcome is living well below my full capacity as a friend, partner, professional, father, husband, lover, and contributing member of my community.
I recall my shyness as a young boy, feeling insecure that I would be left behind. It was not until well into my adulthood that I understood that this fear was attached to my being given up for adoption. The fear manifested in my creating a life of falsehood. Creating a safe haven where the real Michael was hidden became a primary objective, for to open that door would show me as unlovable and someone to be cast aside. After failed marriages, less than desirable professional outcomes and lethal addiction, I realized the fallacy of my life’s journey. The change came as a result of slowly tearing away the fearful foundation upon which I had constructed my reality.
In the continuum of life, on one side exists fear. On the other side are love, compassion and understanding. Fear and love do not exist in the same room, yet fear can be a powerful ignition switch leading to love if one becomes conscious to his/her psychic themes. As with all of life, it involves making a choice.
Waking up to the power of fear can be liberating if one chooses to see fear for what it is and what it is not. Either way, the choice involves recognizing the difference between light and dark, fear and love, authentic and false.
Five myths about fear: